Review: Strengthening the Sense of Self

The Means to Meet the Need

The sense of self is the primal means for creating individuality in a social milieu. Individuality is the primal need conjectured to be associated with the Experience Domain (RHL4). The sense of self can be strengthened in a staged process over time: and this provides greater well-being (the psychosocial pressure) as well as bolstering individuality

Your sense of self is just part of your personal functioning, not the whole of it. It is the part that you use to know where you stand and what you want. It ensures that you know and pursue your own interests while minimizing exploitation by others.

The sense of self comes into existence spontaneously for everyone in the form of "I feel...."  assertions based on emotional sensitivity. This sense can then develop and strengthen by internalizing and realizing sets of attitudes and values, the modes of individualizing, in a particular sequence. These modes derive from the methods of mental stabilization (PH'4).

The end result of the strengthening process is to simultaneously possess a thick skin and a capacity for emotional sensitivity. Neither triumphs nor failures, neither praise nor criticism unbalance you. Events do not determine who you are: you observe and learn from them. Your degree of inner solidity also affects what others think of you and how they treat you.

The Table below summarizes Stage/Mode features and includes the additional two variants of Emotional mode-1. Clicking on the column heading will take you to the acccount of that Stage.

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Strengthening
the Sense
of Self 		Mode-1
Emotional-I 		Mode-2
Social 		Mode-3
Individual 		Mode-4
Sensory 		Mode-1
Emotional-II 		Mode-5
Vital 		Mode-6
Transpersonal 		Mode-7
Relational 		Mode-1
Emotional-III
Promoting Well-Being
Essence Emotional sensitivity Group memberships An authentic self-concept Positive recognition Emotional containment Self testing Humane daily living Meaningful friendships Emotional empathy
Desired Effect Approval
by others		 Acceptance
by others		 Self-respect To feel
good		 Approval is less urgently desired Pride in yourself Serenity Deep loyalties Approval is expected to be reality-based
Means Value confidantes Take on responsibilities Hold ambitions & ideals Maintain a network Reduced dependenceon confidantes Leave your comfort zone Activate
ultimate values		 See inner qualities Close friends serve as confidantes
Handling the Social Milieu
Exercise of Autonomy Ventilate feelings Adopt a fitting persona Protect a private sphere Join in celebrations Ventilate with discretion Think for yourself Be altruistic Discriminate companions Ventilate to share feelings
Social Participation Play comple- mentary roles Follow norms & conventions Foster self-expression Exchange tangible gifts More diversity in pairing Depend on others Infuse strength Engage in dialogues Pairing is non-exploitative
Self-Affirmation Express likes & dislikes Push your views Display sincerity Organise social events More durable likes & dislikes Believe in yourself Maintain integrity Share experiences Likes/dislikes lose influence
Channeling Personal Functioning  
To Boost
Self-esteem		 Be genuine Be responsible Be self-accepting Be convivial Be genuine Be disciplined Be open Be content Be genuine

Stages of Strength

Strengthening is about individualization and individuality. It reflects the progressive mastery of primordial emotional sensitivity through the actualization of inner potentials. Strengthening feeds into a greater coherence, continuity and positive valuation of experiences that combine to generate the conviction that a person possesses a self.

ClosedWhat Spiral Strengthening is Not.

  • Strengthening of the self is not synonymous with personal growth, maturation or individuation. All such phenomena can occur while remaining with an Emotional ethos-φ1.
  • Strengthening is also not about character or ethics, the withstanding of temptation or the following of codes.
  • Nor is strengthening about effectively handling specific situations that require learning and expertise. Again, these can manifest strongly while remaining with an Emotional ethos-φ1.
  • A strong self is liable to be associated with effective personal functioning because, lying within RHL4, it is the central mediator in all endeavours. But endeavours as such are not the focus in the strengthening process.

In Cycle-1 strengthening allows a person to generate the experience of an owned self and control their motivated presence.

In Cycle-2, strengthening allows a person to self-actualize and not just float through life within a comfort cocoon. The everyday and instinctive drive for well-being has to become meaningful, both personally and socially:

The complete strengthening trajectory is shown below:

Values & Drivers

To analyse «individualizing modes», we identified those phenomena which engage directly with managing strength. Spiral principles were applied in a way that appeared appropriate. This led to three broad categories of applicable values:

  • Values that promote personal well-being: 3 in the set.
  • Values for handling the social milieu: 3 in the set.
  • Values that channel personal functioning to boost self-esteem: 1 in the set.

The drivers for progression appeared to vary from Stage to Stage and probably vary from person to person. There might be:

  • A drive to overcome limitations and vulnerabilities of the current Stage e.g. the volatility and instability of emotional sensitivity (φ1) is often disliked.
  • A need for a more valued and coherent sense of self e.g. the greater security that comes from consciously owning a self-concept in the Individual mode (φ3)
  • Pressures from internal or external sources (e.g. ageing, family, peers) e.g. the move to Sensory mode (φ4) is subject to peer pressures.
  • An excessive or distorted use of the current mode e.g. a non-fulfilling life in a comfort-zone might suggest moving to the Vital mode (φ5).

Additional Perspectives

Originally posted:  7-Jan-2016. Last amended: 24-Jun-2016.